Hi…I wanna confess. I recorded this videotape to tell you that I’ve hated you all. I really did, but I’ve learned how to control my frustrations and calm the urge within me to kill every single one of you…Sometimes, I could…Sometimes, I couldn’t. You are pieces of shit, a pile of repugnant intolerable garbage dolls…I don’t hate you because I feel that you’re an inferior species…Well, I do, but not in the way you perceive.
You don’t use your brains enough, or maybe I was gifted to see the bigger picture; you believe in idle ideas and embrace them as if they were the truth.
Security…you endorse your beliefs of living in security, far from harm and the grapples…But what represents security? The policemen in the street? The little gadget above your house’s doors that serves of surveillance cameras? …Even with both of those, I was able to end many lives, Matter of fact, it was easier when those occurred…How shall I name them? …Obstacles, that’s the right term, it was easier when those obstacles occurred, because with them you’re less vigilante, and damned me I used it to my favor…Police they say…And I wonder why I still walk the streets a freeman. You believe in happiness like if the world was a fairy tale…No, peasants. The world is cruel, you take out all the shallows figures from life and all you have left is darkness…I did and I embraced it, and boy I made a fuss for more than half a decade.
Happiness is not an option, and it will never be, you may foul yourself by saying you’re happy when you’re having a nice warm dinner with your wife and children around you, but you’re not. You can’t escape the reality, every time you gaze at your wife you remember how better was that girl you met on your work trip last year, and you wonder if you’ll ever find the courage to erase those late-night texts and delete her phone number…This dark side of yours will walk beside you as long as you walk this blue globe. You take away your eyes from your wife and look at your children, you sense a spray of hope in their smiles and see a little flame of joy in their eyes, then you remember your cousin’s little son who was sexually abused, they’ve broken his spirit and deemed that little flame of his at a young age, you recognize it’s a world where wolves are kept unsupervised, they dominate the bigger picture from behind the curtains.
My mother was like you, I tried to squeeze some sense into her head, but she was reckless, she thought she can look up to sky and reach it, I loved her even if she was cursed and drained out of the motherly meekness, she wasn’t proud of me, she humiliated me, she thought I was the reason of her solitude and that I was a misery magnet…All men flee the weight of the responsibility that comes with a woman holding her little son, but she was my mother and I loved her…That’s why I decided to end her misery and break the handcuffs she wore her whole life with my name engraved on them, I was able to get her a knight, a savior…Even if I was a helpless young boy, I reached to this man and told him “Do you wanna have sex with mommy?”, he was surprised at first but I had the skills to convince him, and then…Well, then I killed them both while in bed, now my mom can be with a man forever…Yes, now you remember that atrocity, the police where everywhere…TV…Press…They even filmed me when I was crying, they didn’t know it was a cry of pride, I made my mom proud…I was too young to be suspected so they said it was a passion crime and convicted one of her exes whom alibi wasn’t solid enough…But, I know…I know you’re all impatient to hear about my masterpiece…Bummer you gonna need to wait, I haven’t finished telling you how much idiocy is burning you, how low you can be…You worship a god, but you don’t even apply half of his orders… »OH GOD SAVE US FROM THIS MONSTROSITY »…This cry of help, this token of vulnerability, I suppose gives you hope, but what is hope? The truth is it’s the beginning of despair, you believe something good will happen to you, and it will change the course of your life, you keep hanging HOPES on a fake HOPE, you see how ridiculous it sounds…pardon me, but you can’t bake cookies using cookies…Ugh, the frustration…I need a glass of water now, unfortunately, I’m not confessing in a precinct, so no agent is willing to be my servant and bring me whatever I want as long as I’m cooperating…Ugh Screw it, I’m too lazy.
My masterpiece…Ah, the screams, the blood spreading tentacular and the sound of bones cracking…These recipients, they make me shiver as I’ve never shaken before, better than any breast I’ve ever squeezed or hole I’ve ever penetrated…I showed to the world the real truth, many considerate it cruelty but I believe it’s salvation, I opened their eyes because you can’t hope for them to do so on their own…Oh no, you need to use this lie of hope and press it to the last drop…You all see hope in the new generation, so I pressed them…Literally…I used the school bus to be the symbol of the fake hope, and I drove right through those kids, I won’t lie but the screams were like a melody to my ears, the chants after winning the war, I finally won and showed you that your beliefs are weak, just like your kids…I killed hope. I actually went and masturbated that day. Huh, the ecstasy I felt that day, I had Goosebumps while ejaculating…But still, one thing made me sad, I actually counted on you…Yes, I’m talking to you detectives…my regards by the way…I counted on you to prove me wrong…but…Ugh, the buts that oppress my heart…You didn’t, you never got me. You were near, but you didn’t. I wanted to believe that I’m wrong, maybe…Maybe, I was as disturbed as my colleagues said…But no. I’m right, I always was and you’re bloody wrong…Now, that you have what you want ladies and gentlemen, and I really need that glass of water, I can tell to go fuck yourselves. I’ll be waiting for you to visit me soon…Your friendly neighbor, the school bus killer.